Haru chan: the chronicles
by nogg
Summary: Hi! I'm Hayley Browns, but please, call me Haru. I absolutely love anime. I might not be good at a lot of things but if its one thing I'm good at, it's explaining the storylines of upwards of 30 different anime in broken Japanese! Follow my adventures as I live my everyday life as an Australian school girl. Author's note: i dont know anything please dont hurt me


**v Free cancer v**

Chapter 1

*beep *beep *beep

The alarm clock continued to sound as Haru turned over to her side.

She had just been spending the last few hours of the early morning watching a marathon of her favourite anime.

With her bright pink katana still strapped onto her back, she arose from the mess of sheets she was just sleeping in for the past 3 hours and shut off her alarm clock.

Haru looked around her room. She saw her certificate; Awarded to Hayley browns. She didn't like that name, she insisted to her school colleagues and online friends they called her Haru instead.

The certificate was just for karate. A participation certificate for attending yet another year at the dojo.

Mum: "Hayley, you're going to be late"

Haru looked at her clock, 8:03am. Her confused expression soon turned to glee as she realised she can now become a generic anime school girl rushing for school.

She raced down the stairs after clumsily performing her morning routines

"おはようございます" haru exclaimed

No one was there to greet her, or at least for telling her off for her horrible pronunciation. Everyone had already left for buses and what not, her mother was still at the door putting her shoes on.

Haru hurriedly toasted some bread to put some jam on. She was going to rush to school and run into some shonen character or whatever, she always believed generic anime tropes would occur in real life.

Haru usually takes the bus to school but this time she decided to walk, well run. How is she supposed to find that shonen if she doesn't do something out of the ordinary.

Haru: "Sorry I'm late"

Homeroom teacher: This is the third time this week Hayley, you need to start showing some maturity in your life by coming to school a little earlier. One more time and you're seeing me for lunch time detention

Hayley, Haru thought that name sounded too white for her, she wanted something japanese, so she stuck with Haru, she usually gets really agitated when people call her Hayley and she usually does things like correct teachers when they mark the roll and call out Hayley. "Umm excuse me miss, can you call me Haru please"

She sat down at the corner of the room. Haru didn't have any friends in homeroom and she spent most of her time on her phone looking at anime reviews and debating with people online.

This time it was some kid in the comments section of a youtube video:.

SaltyNegro:

Anime is gay as fuck to be honest

Haru:

You don't like it because you don't understand it

Eedf:

Anime is actually Japanese propaganda, it's all payback for the two bombs

Haru:

Shut up, dont talk about japan like that

SaltyNegro:

This cunts a big a weeaboo isnt he

She was convinced she could get SaltyNegro to turn his way of thinking around, but just before Haru could finish letting out her rage on her on screen keyboard, the bell rang for first period.

Mathematics. Haru was alright at maths and could get away with Bs on her Tests with minimal studying; just like everyone else in the class. She spent her time doodling pictures of cirno trying to count to 10 to make her feel better about the fact that she couldn't solve quadratic functions using null factor law.

Haru sat next to her friend Kate. Haru was always mesmerized by kate just because she was Chinese. It's basically the closest Haru will ever get to being actually asian, that's what she thinks anyway.

Haru: How're you doing Kate?

Kate: I'm doing fine, you?

Haru: oh my god, I've been spending all of last night catching up on Himouto Umaru Chan R, they made another season and I was just too distracted reading the Oreimo manga

Kate: I never really like umaru chan or oreimo

Haru: why's that

Kate: it's just so boring, I just don't like slice of life all that much

Haru: whaat, no, slice of life is the best

Kate: I usually watch all that much anime but when I do, it's usually something like attack on titan-

Haru's expression screwed up for a moment, _"ew, attack on titan, Kate couldn't even use its japanese name either."_

Haru just absolutely hates overrated anime. She believes that the more attention a series gets, the less it becomes of an actual anime. Still though, Haru concealed her feelings and after a loud exhale through her nose she continued listening

Kate: -uh, well, you know, stuff with action and intense storyline involved

The maths teacher turned around.

"Hayley, please"

"Sorry sir"

The teacher proceeded to scribble a bunch of symbols and numbers as he went on to explain what they meant in nonsensical gibberish. Kate seemed to understand what he was saying, she usually was the one who would answer questions before the teacher could even finish writing it out on the board.

Haru felt extra tired that lesson, so she pulled out her phone and began listening to all her favourite anime openings. She quite recently got her hands on the Card captor sakura soundtrack. She bought it at a convention not too long ago and it was only yesterday she got around to ripping the contents of the CD.

Teacher: Hayley, can you please solve for x

Haru: uh, err, shit

Teacher: I'm sorry what was that?

Haru searched the board desperately for clues, maybe he wrote the answer somewhere on the sides

Haru: F,

Haru: FFFF

Haru: everything will be F

"Shit, wrong one. How can I remember an integral clue for that mindfuck anime when I can't solve for x"

Teacher: I believe a lot more than the answer to this question will be F if you don't listen in class, Hayley. Can someone else answer this, come on guys, what two numbers when-

Haru continued to draw Cirno in her notebook until the bell rang for her next class rang.

Haru sat on the grass waiting for her other friends two friends to join her. She sat back as she gazed at the sky. It was a hot summer reaching temperatures of 26 degrees.

Melony: Hey haru!

Haru: oh hi

Melony: I probably won't be able to stay for too long because I have to leave for the maths enrichment test

Haru: oh, right

Melony was always attending co curricular activities and other smart person things. She's collected awards in assembly countless times and whenever Haru tries to contact melony via some dodgy IRC, melony always says she's busy. Presumably studying.

Haru: look it's Kate

Haru and melony: KATE!

Kate sprinted towards them but was cut off by a flying football. Kate shrieked and jerked back as some fuckboy ran in after it.

Fuckboy: oi cunt, I steal ye lunch money

Kate: err, uh, I'm sorry

Fuckboy: OOOH

The fuckboy ran off with his "mate" as kate collected herself and walked over to the other two girls.

Kate: what was that?

Haru: those fuckboys again, oh they make me mad

Melony: let's be rational about this for a second

Haru: no, I hate those guys, I wish they weren't so annoying

Haru was agitated, it must have been from all those shonen anime she's been watching where the main protagonist is always some obnoxious idiot who has no idea what they're doing.

Two boys hurriedly shuffle towards the girls. Both of which are Asian. The three continue to talk however they all look at the two boys.

Harry: well, go on

Tun: nah, I don't wanna, want to do something else?

Harry: yeah, sure

Kate: do you guys need something?

Tun: err, no, we don't

Kate: alright

The two boys shuffle away from the girls and proceed to approach the fence surrounding the school.

Haru: weird

Kate: boys will be boys I guess

Tun: That was really weird, let's not do that again

Harry: We should do that more often I swear.

Another two boys approach from the distance

William: what are you too faggots doing?

Tun: I dunno, walking around I guess

William turns to face Ben

William: ...So as I was saying, you can basically merge all of your changes to the framework to the origin-

Tun continues to walk with Harry as William and Ben tag along. This is basically how the four usually spend their break times.

Tun: so anyway, have you finished reading doki doki literature club

Ben: OOOOH DOKI DOKI ILLITERATE CLUB OOOOH

William: aaah, what the fuck

Tun and Harry begin to shuffle faster but Ben and William continue to pick up their pace

William: is this that gay game you've been playing at lunch recently Harry?

Harry: IT'S, A HORROR GAME

harry wasn't exasperated, he just needed to raise his voice over the other background noise Ben was making.

William: Yeah it's a horror game, it looks like shit

Ben: OOOOH, ANIME IS MY FAVOURITE OOO

Tun: you guys are acting really queer right now-

Before Tun could finish sentence the bell rang for next period. The four dispersed to attend their classes.

School has finally ended for the day, meaning Haru can finally go home and continue to watch more anime. She boarded the bus this time as she was tired from all the physical activity they made her do in PE.

Mum: Hayley, you've been spending way too much time on the internet, too much screen time is not good for you honey

Haru: no wait, you can do that

Mum: no more chinese cartoons for you

Haru: they're not chinese

Haru muttered this as she stomped into her room. Now she couldn't watch all the currently airing anime due to come out that day. Nevertheless, she still had her school chromebook on her. Her mother only confiscated her phone and laptop but she didn't notice her chromebook.

The chromebook Haru had blocked most anime websites however, so she spent most of her afternoon on an IRC to pass the time.

 _#anime [237 currently online]_

 _Welcome back Haru!_

 _[HARU]: argh, I hate my mum, she just confiscated all my stuff_

 _[HARU]: now I can't watch any anime_

 _[UMARU][friend]: rip_

 _[PXBOI][mod]: press f to pay respecc_

 _[Rnnn]: rest in peperoni_

 _[Rnnn]: what were you going to watch anyway_

 _[HARU]: The boxNekosZ ova_

 _[Rnnn]: fucking trash tbh xd [HARU]_

Normally haru would be offended calling something she loves trash but she knew that the people who she was talking to on #anime didn't usually mean that sort of thing when they say it, especially when the added an xd

 _[HARU]: your trash_

 _[Rnnn]: your mum_

" _What, another response from this guy, this sort of thing never happens for me"_

 _Haru opened up a PM with "Rnnn" after around 30 minutes of public conversation_

 _#Rnnn [Currently online]_

 _You are now talking to Rnnn_

 _[Rnnn] you're that haru kid aren't you_

 _[HARU]: yeah, quick question though, how'd you get lowercases in your name?_

 _[Rnnn]: I know a few mods_

 _[HARU]: that's cool_

 _[HARU]: think u can hook me up with those mods_

 _[Rnnn]: I dunno if I should give you their ips, i'll think about it_

 _[FRIEND REQUEST SENT TO Rnnn]_

 _[Rnnn]: ?_

 _[HARU]: ur kinda funny_

 _[Rnnn]: you're*_

 _[HARU]: pls_

before Haru could finish her last sentence her mother came into her room and took away her chromebook. It didn't really matter to haru anyway, it was 9:45pm, nearly her bedtime.

Haru felt deprived by satisfied by the fact she friended someone new on the #anime server. She spent the rest of the night making up for all the sleep time she spent watching anime and reading manga.

-End of chapter 1 


End file.
